Wednesday, June 06, 2012

Operation Summer Failure

This parenting thing sure is counter-intuitive.  School's out for summer around here, so we are working on some summer projects.  Of course, summer for my kids is not nearly the same as summer when I was a kid.  Will and Helen are still in school/daycare, so their days haven't changed except to add early morning swim lessons three times a week.  So, busier, actually.  Charlie and Joe are in a different camp every week--this week they have a full day of baseball camp and are coming home exhausted.  So depending on the week, also busier for them.  And they have been assigned schoolwork over the summer (when did schools start doing this?), so add that to the mix.  

But still, there are technically fewer real obligations, so we are taking the summer to work on a few things.  I plan to teach all the kids how to sort laundry, for instance.  I know.  Exciting stuff.  

The big project for the summer, however, is Charlie.  Charlie is an amazing kid.  He is motivated, driven, and successful at almost everything he does.  Schoolwork?  All As.  His yearly average in one subject was a 99.  I don't think he ever made less than a 100 on his spelling tests this year, and most of those 100s came on a pre-test, where they took the test cold without having studied the words at all.  And math - he's crazy proficient in math.  He seems to have memorized most of his multiplication facts already, without even trying.  Reading - he has whizzed through all seven Harry Potter books.  One day he told me that he read four different Magic Treehouse books during his free time in class.  And of course sports, his passion?  Amazing defensive baseball player, best basketball player on his team, and a real leader on the soccer field.  Also easily picks up other things, like skiing, golf, football, swimming, etc.  

Charlie's problem, though, is that he is too successful.  He does not handle failure well.  He is super-competitive, and wants to win.  At EVERYTHING.  He does not deal well with adversity.  (Interestingly, he is generally okay with losses in sports though.)  

Well, life is full of adversity, and a big part of a person's character is how to deal with that.  So, our summer project is for Charlie to fail.  Repeatedly.  Sometimes unfairly.  And then teach him how to handle it.  I never thought I would spend a significant amount setting my kid up for failure.  But there you have it.  Parenting is weird.

No comments: